Self-care: it’s something we know is important, yet so many moms feel guilty for taking the time to prioritize their own needs. Between family, work, and everything in between, it can seem like everyone and everything needs you—except yourself. But here’s the reality: making time for yourself isn’t selfish. In fact, it can make you an even better partner, friend, and mom. Because every mom deserves time to recharge.
1. Shift Your Perspective: Self-Care as Essential, Not Optional
It can be hard to shake the feeling that time spent on yourself could be better spent on your family or to-do list. But think of it this way: self-care is like refueling your tank. When you’re running on empty, it’s challenging to bring your best self to the table. Start by reframing self-care as an essential, not a luxury. Just as you prioritize family routines, try to build personal time into your schedule—even if it’s only 10 minutes daily.
Tip: List small, feel-good activities (a quick meditation, a cup of tea, or even stepping outside for fresh air). When you’re short on time, go to your list and choose a quick “reset” moment.
2. Start Small: The Power of Mini Self-Care Moments
Sometimes, the thought of self-care feels overwhelming—like you need an hour or a full day off to make it count. But the truth is, self-care doesn’t have to be time-consuming to be impactful. Try adding mini self-care moments to your day, like taking deep breaths before responding to your email, stepping away for a quick stretch, or even enjoying a small treat without multitasking.
Food for thought: Consider creating a “self-care jar” with slips of paper listing quick activities you enjoy. When you have a few spare minutes, pick a slip and give yourself permission to indulge in that mini moment.
3. Practice Saying “Yes” to Help
Let’s be honest—accepting help can be tough. But allowing friends or family to lend a hand, even in small ways, can free up precious moments for yourself. Next time someone offers to help, practice saying “Yes, thank you!” without guilt or hesitation. Remember, accepting help doesn’t mean you’re not capable; it just means you’re making space for your own needs, too.
Tip: Keep a list of small tasks you’d love help with, like folding laundry or watching the kids for a bit. That way, if someone offers, you’re ready to say yes and carve out a moment for you.
4. Set Boundaries, Kindly and Firmly
Setting boundaries isn’t about cutting people off; it’s about protecting your time and energy. If you’re consistently giving time to everyone but yourself, it’s okay to carve out moments that are off-limits to distractions. Whether closing your door for a few minutes or letting calls go to voicemail, protecting your time helps you recharge.
Food for Thought: Try creating a “do not disturb” period each day, even if it’s only 15 minutes. Use this time to do something that makes you feel relaxed, energized, or just… you.
5. Let Go of the “All or Nothing” Mentality
One big hurdle to self-care is the feeling that it has to be perfect or complete to count. Maybe you feel like a quick five minutes doesn’t really make a difference. But the truth is, self-care can be small, inconsistent, or even a little messy and still be incredibly valuable. Release the pressure to do it perfectly, and focus on how each small action builds up over time.
Tip: At the end of each week, write down one small thing you did for yourself each day. When you see the small moments add up, it’s easier to let go of guilt and feel accomplished.
6. Model Self-Care as a Gift to Your Family
One of the best ways to overcome self-care guilt is to remember that you’re setting an example. By taking time for yourself, you’re showing your kids and family that self-care is a normal, healthy part of life. You’re teaching them that taking care of yourself is just as important as caring for others.
Food for Thought: Talk openly with your kids about why self-care matters. Simple conversations, like “Mom’s going to read for a few minutes because it makes me feel happy and relaxed,” help normalize self-care for the next generation.
7. Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection
Finally, give yourself grace. Overcoming self-care guilt isn’t an overnight process; it’s about making small shifts and being kind to yourself along the way. Every time you take even a small moment for yourself, celebrate it! Progress matters more than perfection, and each small step you take gets you closer to a balanced, happy, and guilt-free self-care routine.
Tip: Keep a self-care journal where you jot down any “wins” from the week. No matter how small, recognizing those wins will reinforce the positive impact self-care has on your life.
Self-care guilt is a common struggle, but it doesn’t have to stop you from taking care of yourself. By making small, meaningful changes and embracing the journey, you’ll find that each step you take to prioritize yourself has ripple effects. Head over to our blog for more tips and support on creating a balanced life that leaves room for you!